What To Do If A Boyfriend Pressures You For Sex

So you’ve got a boyfriend and you’ve been going out for a while. You’ve dated a number of times, shared a coffee, been to some restaurants maybe, seen a movie and stolen some kisses. There’s been some hugging and touching and maybe even some petting and more physical stuff. Now your boyfriend is starting to talk about sex but you’re not sure if you want to go that far.

This is a common scenario for many teenage girls and you need to think seriously about it because sex at any age is a serious matter.  lekkere dikke meiden  It’s not just a physical thing – if it was, life would be simpler! However, sex also has emotional, psychological, social and spiritual aspects to it which you need to think about. Perhaps you’ve never thought of those before, so let me fill you in!

You probably know what to expect physically – you learnt it in biology class at school, you’ve seen it in movies, talked about it in the schoolyard. However, there are emotional issues, too.

You are a HUMAN BEING, consisting of body and soul. What you do with your body affects your soul, and vice versa. If you are sick in the hospital because your body is not well, you might feel isolated and alone in your soul;  extreme sex films  if you are depressed in your soul, this manifests itself as tiredness and lethargy in the body. Sex is no different. You need to feel happy with the idea of having sex in order to truly enjoy it in your body. Many married women with a husband of many years have negative feelings about their sexuality and this affects their ability to enjoy sex, so if you’re with a short-term boyfriend and underage, how amazing do you think this sex is going to be, anyway? You need to feel safe before it can feel good for you.

In addition, everyone wants to feel special, worthy, accepted and loved. People feel like this when those around them treat them well.  chicas calientes  Teenagers with loving parents who care for their kids, whose parents are always there for them, whose parents are firm but allow their kids freedom and privileges, who love their teens with no strings attached, will feel special, worthy, accepted and loved. Teens such as these have high levels of self-esteem and are able to resist peer pressure to conform to the values of teens around them. Conversely, teens whose parents are unreliable, inconsistent or dysfunctional will have issues concerning feeling special – instead, they will feel unworthy, unaccepted and unloved by their parents. These teens therefore need much more acceptance from their peers in order to feel special and as though they belong.  chat en vivo They will be more willing to accept the values of teens around them, even if those values include some antisocial behaviours. When it comes to sex, you need to question your motives and think about whether agreeing to have sex with your boyfriend is truly because you feel happy to do it, convinced that it will enrich your life experience, or whether you are doing it simply to feel like you belong with him so that he will accept you because you need to feel special and wanted. Teens who have had sex under these conditions report a “feels so good, hurts so bad” experience, where, even if they enjoyed the sex (which, unfortunately, is unlikely for your first time), they have feelings of being used and sense that the things they believed in and dreams they had have been degraded and devalued, since they gave  webcambabes  themselves body and soul to another human being and that person just walked away as though those things didn’t matter. Plus, teens who have had multiple sexual partners develop psychological problems, do poorly at school, often drop out of education, get pregnant earlier, feel depressed, find it harder to hold down a job and do well in life and feel less happy than those who chose to wait until they were older.

Sex definitely gets better with age. Almost everyone in their 20’s, 30’s or older, when asked if it was a good idea for them to have had sex when they were teenagers, say, “No, it wasn’t – I should have waited until later”. Most people report that their first time was pretty poor-quality sex, with it being a fast, hurried experience – the boy’s hands shaking as he undoes the buttons of her shirt, clumsy kisses, groping hands, smudged make-up, the boy spending 10 minutes just working out how to take her bra off, elbows jabbing her, then 30 seconds of uncomfortable thrusting before it’s all over and he falls asleep. Is it really worth it?

Spiritually, there are issues, too. If you come from a religious background, a decision to have sex now will affect your relationship with God, maybe people at church or your place of worship, members of your religious community may become judgemental and so on.

So, as you can see, sex when you’re a teenager introduces a lot of serious stuff into your life. In my personal opinion, a decision to have sex now is rarely a good idea. I would be incredibly surprised if you had sex now and told me that it was amazing, you felt your life was enhanced, your values and beliefs were strengthened, your self-esteem rose to a higher level, you felt accepted by everyone in your life and your view of the world and life in general was improved. To be honest with you, this is unlikely.

 

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